Conversation About Platonic Relationships and "The One"

Do you know this person?  Report IM Spam
V (2:21:41 PM): haha thanks for your comment on xanga
Me (2:22:12 PM): lol
V (2:22:01 PM): my friend is writing a paper on platonic relationships and i was doing a lot of thinking about it
V (2:22:05 PM): so you do think it's possible?
Me (2:22:38 PM): i do think it's possible, but
Me (2:22:41 PM): to put it bluntly
Me (2:22:47 PM): guys are very horny
Me (2:22:50 PM): :P
V (2:22:36 PM): they think down there instead of up there
V (2:22:39 PM): yes
V (2:22:40 PM): haha
Me (2:23:06 PM): yes
Me (2:23:15 PM): it's like we can only run one at a time
V (2:22:56 PM): haha
V (2:23:11 PM): but my friend who is writing the paper made a point - she says that platonic relationships can work out if both parties are involved with other people
V (2:23:19 PM): do you think that's the only exception?
Me (2:24:50 PM): nothing is guaranteed
Me (2:25:19 PM): no, i don't think it's the only exception
Me (2:25:38 PM): but at this point in our lives, it's hard to imagine otherwise
V (2:25:46 PM): i'm just kind of confused on the topic
V (2:25:56 PM): because i feel like society stresses that platonic relationships don't exist
V (2:26:04 PM): but at the same time, three of my best friends are guys and we're strictly friends
V (2:26:48 PM): i just feel like society is trying to tell us that this is an impossible situation
V (2:26:59 PM): but at the same time - it's occurring in my life, so what makes it impossible?
Me (2:27:36 PM): it's not impossible, just not likely
Me (2:27:50 PM): i'd say you're the exception, not the rule
V (2:27:32 PM): ok
V (2:28:02 PM): but what about things like attraction? like in the quote i found from the movie - once the attraction thing is out there, the friendship isn't quite a friendship anymore
V (2:28:28 PM): it doesn't matter if you act on that impulse of being attracted to the other person - it's just the idea of being attracted that crosses the boundary from being "just" friends into possibly something else
Me (2:29:06 PM): very true
Me (2:29:22 PM): i have crossed that line many times
V (2:29:08 PM): haha thank you for your honesty
V (2:29:10 PM): i'm sure i have to
V (2:29:11 PM): too'
V (2:29:19 PM): just thinking about it but not even acting on it
Me (2:30:10 PM): there's the thought of, "so what if..."
Me (2:30:46 PM): and then, if it goes on to the conclusion of, "hey, that'd be amazing!"
Me (2:31:08 PM): then there are apt to be changes in the way you relate to that person
V (2:30:58 PM): which is what changes the boundaries of the friendship, i think
Me (2:31:33 PM): well, unilaterally
V (2:31:14 PM): true
Me (2:32:06 PM): on my part, many of my relationships are really, "open to a relationship if you want it"
Me (2:32:16 PM): well, were
Me (2:32:25 PM): i decided to be more selective :P
V (2:32:15 PM): but in the Bible, God says that man and woman are created to be together - without a doubt - but surely that can't mean that every girl you meet has to have potential to be the one?
Me (2:32:48 PM): i don't believe in the one
V (2:32:27 PM): or that every boy i meet has potential to be a future husband?
V (2:32:33 PM): so what do you believe in?
Me (2:33:24 PM): well, i can say why i don't believe in "the one"
V (2:33:14 PM): go ahead
V (2:33:15 PM): i want to hear this
Me (2:33:57 PM): where its definition is, someone for whom God prepared for you since before time began
Me (2:34:41 PM): meaning that, ever since time did begin, it was written in the stars, YOU WILL MARRY HARRY OR MARY, OR WHOEVER I HAVE ORDAINED
Me (2:34:45 PM): lol
V (2:34:40 PM): haha
V (2:35:16 PM): well i think that God's will for us is everchanging - because after God gave us free will, there's no way we can ever make all the right decisions according to a set plan that God has for us, right?
Me (2:35:45 PM): i think the fact that God lets us remarry just throws the whole thing out the window
V (2:35:27 PM): how so?
Me (2:36:11 PM): because you marry someone, he's the one, then he dies, and then you marry someone else
Me (2:36:18 PM): he can't possibly also be THE one
V (2:35:56 PM): that's true
V (2:36:03 PM): i was actually thinking about that earlier last week
V (2:36:07 PM): except in terms of true love
V (2:36:19 PM): and if there really is a such thing as "one true love", then how can you remarry?
V (2:36:27 PM): it'd be like you were settling for less or settling for the next best thing
Me (2:36:54 PM): he's just the one at the current time
Me (2:38:16 PM): how to put it best...
Me (2:39:35 PM): this is so hard, lol
Me (2:39:52 PM): alright, here goes
V (2:39:37 PM): haha ok
Me (2:42:37 PM): ah, dammit
V (2:42:21 PM): too hard to explain?
Me (2:42:56 PM): maybe i should try through different examples
V (2:42:37 PM): ok
Me (2:43:31 PM): i believe that humans choose, at every moment, which path they will go on through life
Me (2:43:47 PM): there are millions of possibilities at any given moment for where your life will go
Me (2:44:35 PM): and for one possibility, you may meet person A, who God deems will be best for you
Me (2:44:44 PM): but on the other path, you may meet person B
Me (2:45:30 PM): or maybe, after going on the first path, you may take yet another path, and person C is the one who will best help your life reflect God's glory
Me (2:46:00 PM): so to say that there was, is, and will ever be only one person for any other
Me (2:46:18 PM): denies the validity of human choices
Me (2:46:22 PM): at least in my mind
Me (2:46:37 PM): and remarriage seems to support that
Me (2:48:20 PM): so in short, God has divine providence in store at every possibility of your existence
V (2:48:11 PM): so you think that God has a best option for you depending on which path yo utake?
Me (2:48:55 PM): yep, and that best option is "the one"
Me (2:49:08 PM): but... one of many potentialities
V (2:48:47 PM): but do you think there's an ultimate BEST option?
V (2:48:48 PM): like
V (2:48:52 PM): as impossible as this sounds
V (2:49:09 PM): you take all the correct choices (like a create your own story novel) that God wants you to take
V (2:49:15 PM): instead of taking some right, some wrong
V (2:50:01 PM): and after you take all the correct roads
V (2:50:09 PM): God gives you the ultimately best option
V (2:50:21 PM): instead of the other ones that are probably semi-best
Me (2:50:47 PM): of course
Me (2:52:06 PM): but i think God works with what He has to make your life more glorifying to Him... so He can make even the bad things work for the good
V (2:52:12 PM): but then wouldn't you still be settling for someone who's best for you at the time - instead of aiming for someone who's ultimately the best for you?
Me (2:53:58 PM): you could... but when you choose one path in life, you could be locking out the best option available to you at the beginning, so it's a non-factor
V (2:53:41 PM): that's true
Me (2:54:49 PM): i don't doubt lots of people out there are spending their lives with people who are less than what they might have gotten had they made different choices
Me (2:55:15 PM): but that's human existence, and God redeems it
Me (2:56:08 PM): so even someone who was horrible before can become an epitome of life in Christ
V (2:55:57 PM): hang on i'll brb
V (2:55:59 PM): keep talking
Me (2:56:23 PM): and what could be better than that?
Me (2:57:10 PM): the whole point of "the one" is someone who joins his life with yours to help your life better reflect His work in you
Me (2:58:07 PM): so even if person A isn't the best of all possible choices, his redemption can make him "the one" for the path you've taken in life
Me (2:59:58 PM): so bottom line, marriage isn't about two people coming together because they won't have any problems, but two people who, together in Christ, overcome the problems they encounter
Me (3:00:12 PM): that is the picture of God's redemptive work
Me (3:02:01 PM): of course, that's not to say you shouldn't try to make, with the help of God, the wisest choice possible and go marry a trashy bum or whore
Me (3:03:18 PM): that would be flat out dishonoring to God