As some of you may have heard, a live sex demonstration occured after a class session for a human sexuality class at Northwestern. A girl shed her clothing and her boyfriend used a sex tool to penetrate her and bring her to orgasm.
Here's the Christian principle on sex: Sex is good... within marriage. The question here is, "What is the meaning of 'within marriage?'" Does it mean that sex should be kept out of sight from the public sphere? But another question would be... "Wouldn't good sex be better (within marriage), and better sex be awesome?" How does a couple make sex better? Are they to rely only on experimentation? Is the dissemination of knowledge about how to please your spouse better an illicit transfer of knowledge?
One issue often brought up is that, more often than not, the sufferers in the event of low quality sex are more often the females. Females have been long-suffering in the traditional marriage, sexually in addition to the myriad number of other ways.
Scenario: A dude is a premature ejaculator. There is no possible way he is gonna please his wife with his penis before he finishes. Is it ok for him to go to say, a book or a sex therapist, to get ideas or advice on other methods to please his wife? What ways of learning this information cross the line into sin?
I am all for females orgasming. I am all for better sex. I just don't think a demonstration is necessary to learn the information to make orgasms happen. I assume throughout this post that the demonstration is carried out with the best of intentions. But... is intent enough to separate this demonstration from any other sexual presentation (including porn)? I don't think so.
Now, what is so different about a live demonstration (as opposed to a book or a therapist)? Why is this not different from porn or a performance at a strip club? One can argue that, since this event was a performance, that the entire audience was invited into what should have been reserved for just a husband and his wife. Why should the fact that this demonstration happened for the sake of knowledge (as opposed to pleasure) make it exempt from the same judgment that a lapdance or stripping routine receives?
In my humble opinion, the educational value of such a demonstration is dubious, at best. It doesn't take much skill to stick a power tool into your partner. Does that point to more sleazy intentions? Not necessarily, although I do believe that the mixed reactions to the demonstration, even on my own part, shows how deadened we are... not just to the sin that occured, but to the very wonder that sex should be. Such reactions are the aggregate result of all the other influences in our culture. I write my arguments out of a purely logical approach to what Scripture has to say about sex, but my heart is unmoved.
